“YES’ I knew that I needed to listen to God voice always as He directs my ways, but I was so desperate to be loved that I removed my eyes from the CROWN. I even lost focus on God in the process when I tried to make it work on my own”.

We invest time and go all out to make it work on our own. You even loose focus, compromise your believes and you bend so many rules to accommodate the other party. But relationships like that do not last. We make the same mistakes of not letting God take the lead in every situation in our lives over and over again.

The thing is if we are so desperate, everything makes sense and it’s correctly packed in our human eyes. And the longer you invest time in that thing then the truth starts unfolding or you see the situation for what it really is. You look around you, everything you calculated or hoped for seems not to be true and you are not sure if you will be able to deal with the results or handle the situation on your own.

There’s also “Fear Of The Unknown” After several disappointments you start doubting yourself and you think of what people will say about you. Oh Yes’ History repeated itself. Fear and Rejection start overwhelming you; bitterness and tiredness steps in. You start reading the bible and Pray less and less. Soon you stop because you are always so exhausted because your mind if over woking.

But then I spoke to my Sister who reminded me of my worth and how am wonderfully made. She told me that it’s not my fault and I should not be with someone who I should compromise myself for. My Pastor Edgar said that the is nothing wrong with me and reminded me that I do not have a problem, that I must dust my self and focus on God’s Glory.

™°For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord , “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/jer.29.11.NIV

So I learnt that even though you prayed and asked God for something; the devil can still interfere and twist the whole situation around for his gain. So we need to continue asking God to take a Lead and Guide us always in every situation. Go back to Him and ask if that gift you received if from Him. And listen carefully when He speaks because He will never lead you in the wrong path. God has good plans for each and everyone of us, and to prosper us not to harm us. Let’s learn to trust him completely nd believe that whatever we ask for He will give us in his own time